anatomy of a habit
Anatomy of a Habit | Overeating  |  Other Habits We Help With |  The Habit Cycle Graph

TRIGGER

My boss yells at me . . .

Triggers can come from our environment or inside ourselves.

ACTION

. . . so I over eat.

TRIGGER

My boss yells at me . . .

This is an outside trigger.

NEED

I need understanding.

Being human means having needs.  A basic human need is to feel understood.

THOUGHTS

I will never be understood . . .
Anyway, he is such a jerk . . . 
I should just quit . . .
I can't be without a job . . .
Maybe it's my fault . . .

When we deny or repress our needs, we retreat into a world of thoughts, which can be filled with criticisms, judgments, blame, and confusion.

EMOTIONS

I feel angry and sad.

The emotions that arise are often determined by the thoughts that preceded it.  We often avoid feeling emotions by numbing them or acting them out.

IMPULSE

I have to eat that whole cake.
I need to feel better NOW!

When we resist or control our true needs – and their thoughts and feelings – we create pressure in our system that urgently seeks relief.  The relief-seeking impulse is often a misguided attempt to get the original need met.

THOUGHTS

I shouldn't.  It's bad for me.

Judgmental thoughts continue to arise about our inner experience.

ACTION

I eat the whole cake.

An action happens to alleviate the pressure and meet the need.  This is only a short term pleasure.  In our haste, the action is often not the one that meets our true need.

THOUGHTS

I can't believe I did that again.  I'm so weak.  What a loser.

Judgments about our habits become the new trigger and the cycle begins again.